It’s been a football kinda week.

 On Friday 21 I took the car out for a toddle and arrived at ANZ stadium to see the Pies play the Swans. I should have known that a loss at the opponent’s home ground would lead me to want to poke out one of my eyes with a bodkin. I would then truly be the one eyed supporter my friends accuse me of.

Good thing my fellow Magpie lover and I had bought a stash of gin and tonic so we could slink off discretely to our room – above the victory hotel – and drown our sorrows.  Equally fortuitous was the fact that mobile service was intermittent so we had a good excuse to ignore calls from the ABC followers (Anyone But Collingwood). Regardless of their mighty persistence….if only the boys had been…but I am drifting off into daydream….

Monday was Brownlow day and despite his two weeks in-house suspension for being a naughty boy, I still held a faint hope that Swannie might do it two years in a row. He came close.

I love the red carpet bit where the footy wives and dates parade and tell us who has donated their gown, and the boys do likewise with their suits - which are all remarkably similar. 

Brynne Edelsten is my favourite, and this year’s ballooning tutu number was a stand out. You have to give her points for brazen sassiness. I might even have to put a reminder in to my telly so it pokes me when her reality show starts.

But I didn’t vote for her in my top three best dressed and I obviously got that wrong anyway as my free tickets to the grand final have not arrived yet.

The medal presentation had some interesting moments. I’m sure the table didn’t know that their conversation had been picked up when one ‘date’ who tried to straddle her footballer’s knee and  give him mouth to mouth resuscitation,  was told in very stern terms by the Captain’s wife  to: Get off  him. Interestingly, Miss slinky red dress was nowhere to be seen when the cameras panned the table the next time.

There were great video clips. I liked that Jaffa headed up the fans section. I liked the tag line we’ve seen for the finals: This is greatness – although in the universal scheme of things that’s probably something of an overstatement. …..And if you count the Pies form last Friday it was anything but great…..whoops...I digress again…… 

Back to my point.  Behind Jaffa’s head as the clip came to an end was loomed large: THIS IS 

GRATENESS.

Irony?  I ask myself .

Are they trying to say something about fans being grating?

Is this a go at the literacy level of Collingwood fans that my so called friends refer to continually during football season? 

Or, did someone just stuff up?

As the week went on I finally was able to breathe out again when Travis signed for the next five years with the knowledge that Mick would not whisk him away to the arch rivals Caaaaarlton, And I can continue to watch him throw hands-full of dirt each week - that's literally, not figuratively.

So, I’m now preparing for the grand final. This year I won’t have to sit on the edge of the seat, fear a heart attack, or listen to the abuse of the ABC supporters.  I will even get to hear Paul Kelly instead of the bat out of hell let loose previously by someone who obviously had bats in the belfry.

 And I won’t miss out on the barbeque because I am sobbing in to my tissue.

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This week's art work:

 The best I can do given I am posting early.

You have already seen the magpie and the swan. I have not got a picture of a hawk....so you will have to settle for a chook.... at least it's still in the bird family.

Spartacus. Acrylic on canvas